When I was six years old, my older brother and I were determined to see Santa Claus in action, putting presents under our tree. We sat awake in our dark bedroom, listening intently for any sounds that might tell us Santa was there.
Just after 11:00 pm, we heard shuffling on the floor above us. With all the stealth our excitement-filled little bodies could manage, we crept slowly up the stairs. Our house — a split-level entry — had stairs that went to our bedroom in the basement and stairs that opened up right to where the Christmas tree stood. We inched up the stairs until we were just high enough to peer over the remaining steps.
We quickly recognized our parents, kneeling by the tree, organizing gifts.
No red coat. No round belly. No boots. No sound of reindeer on the roof.
Just our parents.
Of course, when you’re little, that kind of discovery can be soul-crushing. As I got older, the sting of that moment faded, replaced by a deep appreciation for the memories my parents worked so hard to create. As my wife and I have seen our own children grow up and stop believing, I’ve reflected back on my parents’ efforts and our own. And lately, I’ve been struck by how easily the world around me reinforces the story of Santa Claus. The twinkling lights, the movies, the songs — all of it paints a vivid picture that felt impossible to question as a child. And I wasn’t alone in this experience.
Experts point out that there’s a tremendous amount of cultural reinforcement of Santa’s existence. During the holiday season, you’ll see depictions of the jolly old elf in many countries around the world. He’s in movies and on TV. Reporters cover him on the news. Google has a Christmas Eve Santa tracker. Even though it seems implausible that one man delivers presents to every child on the planet from a flying sleigh pulled by magic reindeer, kids hear that it’s true from nearly every adult in their lives. In fact, pointing out evidence that suggests Santa might not exist while in a child’s hearing is practically taboo.
With all that, it’s no wonder kids go along with the story.
The Origins of St. Nick
In 2nd Century BC Rome, the festival of Saturnalia was celebrated from December 17 to 23 in honor of Saturn, the god of, among other things, abundance and wealth. This was a time of feasting, merrymaking, and gift exchanges among Roman citizens.
Of course, the Christian adaptation is most commonly cited as the origins for gift-giving, which was reimagined to reflect the Biblical Wise Men, who presented the baby Jesus with gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh, reinforcing the exchange of gifts during the celebration of Jesus’s birth.
The idea of Santa Claus, however, rose from the real 4th-century bishop Saint Nicholas who was famous for his generosity and secret gift-giving. He even had a feast day on December 6th that became associated with distributing gifts, especially to children. Over time, this persona evolved into Santa Claus.
By the late 18th century, the practice of giving gifts to family members at Christmas was firmly rooted in hundreds of cultural traditions. With it came a desire to commemorate the spirit of giving associated with the holiday.
The Over-commercialization of Christmas
Black Friday is an idea that emerged in the 1980s as the approximate day each year when retailers went from being in the red to being in the black — that they were finally making a profit on the sales for that year.
It was in the early 2000s when stores started opening early in the morning with “door-buster” sales that the lunacy of Black Friday really started to take hold.
- Since 2006, there have been at least 17 deaths and 125 injuries associated with Black Friday shopping in the US. These include stampedes, shootings, stabbings, and fistfights among shoppers.
- About 44% of those injuries resulted from people fighting over discounted products.
- In 2008, a Walmart worker died after being trampled by a crowd of shoppers who broke into the store.
- In 2011, a woman used pepper spray to control other shoppers which resulted in 20 people being injured.
- The US Department of Commerce reports more than $112.1 billion lost in retail theft in 2022 with a large portion attributed to Black Friday sales.
I might be out of school here, but I don’t think tramping each other to get to the last boxed item is what Saint Nicholas had in mind when he started giving gifts to people, and that kind of behavior is completely at odds with the hushed reverence that surrounds the Christian Christmas tradition.
Return to Santa
Somewhere along the way, probably circa 1980, we lost sight of what Santa Claus really represents. The spirit of giving that Saint Nicholas embodied wasn’t about extravagance or checking off a wish list of gadgets and baubles destined to gather dust or be replaced by next year’s model. It certainly wasn’t about sales quotas, obnoxious advertising, or trampling each other to grab a discounted TV. It was about meaningful gestures, small, thoughtful acts of kindness, and sharing joy with the people who matter most.
Let’s look at the symbol Santa Claus is as a reminder of heartfelt generosity. What grandparent doesn’t love receiving a handmade drawing from a child, a neighbor dropping off a home-made treat, or making time to connect with loved ones? Those are gifts that hold far more value than anything store-bought; the kind that don’t fade after the wrapping paper is thrown away.
The commercial frenzy surrounding Christmas is a complete contrast to Christmas’s deeper meaning. We’ve allowed ourselves to be swallowed up by a culture that equates love with the size of a price tag. All that does is leave us feeling exhausted, anxious, and unfulfilled. Fortunately, we don’t have to let that kind of chaos define the holiday.
It’s time to reclaim Santa Claus as a symbol of thoughtful giving. Instead of focusing on how much we spend, we can focus on the meaning behind our gifts. A heartfelt letter to a friend, a memory captured in a photo, or even giving the gift of our presence can be far more valuable than any item from a store.
When we embrace the spirit of giving as Saint Nicholas intended, we honor the best parts of the holiday season — joy, connection, and helping others feel loved.
Forty years ago, I learned Santa Claus wasn’t who I thought he was. It took getting a little older and a little bit wiser to realize that Santa is and should be something more enduring. For me, he became a symbol of my parents’ love, their sacrifice, and their desire to create a bit of magic in my life. Now, as I look at Christmas through the eyes of my children, I realize that Santa is real — but only if we choose to make him real. Let’s make this holiday season about the gifts that truly matter, the kind that leave their mark long after the tree comes down.
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