In my day job, I get pulled into a lot of impromptu meetings. Sometimes, they’re important. Most of the time, they’re distractions from something else more important.
On a frigid winter morning, I got pulled into another meeting. My boss wanted to share some really good news. I had my phone in my pocket and my trusty running watch on. Right away, they both started buzzing with alerts from text messages and Microsoft Teams chats. I refrained from pulling my phone out of my pocket for almost five minutes, but my mind — trained as it is to responding right now to notifications — was on whatever I was missing on my phone and not on the exciting news my boss had.
We’ve all been in the situation — either as the victim or the perpetrator — when you’re having a conversation with someone and you receive a notification on your device. You pull your attention away from the person in front of you to address the distraction on your device. When you’re engaged in casual conversation around the literal or figurative water cooler, it’s probably okay to interrupt the casual conversation to get back to work. Outside of that, why do we divert our attention from the people right in front of us for things that can most likely wait?
In our hyper-connected reality, the phenomenon has been termed The Attention Economy. People and things vying for our attention are nothing new. What is new is the speed at which calls for our attention come.
Modern technology, particularly social media and communication tools, is designed to capture and monetize our attention. This almost always comes at the expense of our real-world interactions and focus.
For me, focus is the biggest problem. In my work, I’m occasionally tasked with programming workable solutions to complex problems. That kind of work requires deep focus. I share a physical office space with three other individuals. I have also formed a bad habit of keeping email and messaging apps open on my computer and phone all the time. In a given day, I receive more than one hundred emails and fifty to sixty direct messages or group chats.
As I mentioned, I have three employees. The most seasoned has been with the company just over one year. Our business is in a rapidly growing industry, so the dynamics of our work change frequently. Hardly a day goes by that I’m not interrupted with multiple questions and work sessions with those three employees.
However, I often interrupt scheduled training sessions to address an email or a phone call which leaves my new employee, in particular, sitting and waiting.
What message am I sending to that employee?
There will, of course, be instances where my attention is required elsewhere. However, these interruptions are often not important and are rarely urgent.
It’s a question of quickly evaluating the most valuable use of time in that moment, where that value may not be monetary.
I live in a place where during about 7 months of the year, I can do bi-monthly training sessions with my employees while we walk outside. When discussing a new concept where I know taking notes will be useful, I review the concept on the walk then encourage my employees to take notes when we get back from our walk. We leave a few minutes at the end of the training session to clarify anything in their notes.
When attempting to truly connect with my employees, these walking training sessions have a couple of useful advantages:
- Moving the body has a tendency to aid creativity.
- When we’re away from the office and the potential for listening ears, my employees are more apt to open up about their thoughts and feelings about things.
- It’s harder for my boss to interrupt me when I’m not there to be interrupted.
- Exposure to sunlight generally lifts one’s mood.
- Since we are mostly “desk jockeys,” it’s good to stretch the legs.
- Being away from our desks, my employees know they’ve got my undivided attention. As opposed to when we’re in the office, I never pull my phone out of my pocket unless its use is required as part of our walking discussion.
That’s not an exhaustive list of simple ways I can connect with my employees. Even though I’m prone to distractions while in the office, those walking-coaching sessions demonstrate my willingness to be 100% focused on the employee for that 15- or 30-minute period twice a month. It’s not much but does a lot to bolster morale.
These principles, of course, can be extended into our personal lives.
There’s no escaping the fact that we live in a distraction-filled world. Time has perhaps always been a precious resource, but the number of demands on our time each day has made that extremely apparent. The simple act of being present with the people around us is both rare and invaluable. Disconnecting from devices and focusing on real human interactions sends a powerful message to the person right in front of us: that they are important to us. Small, simple, intentional actions create deeper connections and boost morale.
Nobody will ever remember that day you responded to 97 emails, but almost everyone will remember how you made them feel.
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