The Good Stuff Doesn't Need a Cheerleader

I rarely get enough sleep, so when an opportunity arises to sit still and listen to someone speak, I struggle to stay awake. I know I’ve missed a lot of good seminar content as my chin rests on my chest. Thankfully, I don’t drool. . .much.

It was a rare thing when I recently sat in a meeting, alert and attentive to what the speaker was saying. The speech was on a topic that I’d been contemplating for a while. Earlier that day, a thought occurred to me which was echoed almost verbatim by the speaker.

It was an aha! moment.

At times, those moments of discovery are followed by a quick login to several social media platforms to post about what I just learned. In the particular instance I just mentioned, I didn’t feel the urge to get on social media at all.

I just relished in the moment.

Profound moments occur in everyone’s life. These are the moments that shape who we are and serve as the basis for some of our deepest personal connections. These, our best and worst moments, have their own intrinsic value.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to share a profound moment with family, friends, or on social media. Where discretion and scrutiny are required, however, is when external validation starts to become more important than the intrinsic value of the experience itself.

In social gatherings, there’s a difference between the person who tends to be the life of the party and the person who is self-absorbed and can’t seem to stop talking about themselves and their accomplishments. The comedian Brian Regan has a bit where he talks about people trying to one-up each other at a party. Then, in walks Neil Armstrong who deadpans, “I’ve walked on the moon.”

Perhaps if you could claim having been in a two-person submersible that’s dived to the deepest depths ever reached, you might be on parallel with Mr. Armstrong’s accomplishment. Otherwise, if you’re playing the comparison game, you’ll lose every time.

The point here is that if your two-fold purpose in sharing something is to brag about your own accomplishments and devalue the accomplishments of others, just keep it to yourself.

There are some experiences — those profounds moments — that should be recognized for what they are, without feeling the need to (over)share them for external validation. Cherish what you learn in solitude then decide if sharing is more about fitting in than learning something for yourself.

We live in the time of oversharing for the sake of popularity, and much of what’s being shared is cut from whole cloth. Taking a step back to reflect on our own experiences and appreciate them can be inspiring, refreshing, and grounding. We don’t always need cheerleaders to hype the special moments of our lives.