Reason: An Imperative Duty

 

Photo by Joseph Corl on Unsplash

During the Korean War, Ensign Frank Blair served on a troop transport ship stationed in Japan. The captain appointed Ensign Blair to be the ship’s informal chaplain, as the ship was too small to have a formal one.

One night, the ship was caught in a severe typhoon with waves over 40 feet high. Late in the night, three of the engines had stopped working, and a crack was reported in the centerline of the ship.

In an act that must have terrified him, Ensign Blair requested permission from the captain to move around the ship to assess areas of concern firsthand.

When Ensign Blair got to the stern of the ship, he held fast to the rail with a rope tied around his waist and peered into the blackness. The ship rose and fell over a huge swell large enough that the propellors came out of the water. Ensign Blair could see they sped up as they left the water. So when they hit the water, the propellors were under tremendous load.

Ensign Blair recommended to the captain that they slow the ship even though the engineer had just recommended the opposite. The engineer wanted to outrun the storm, but Ensign Blair reasoned that the strain was too much for the remaining engines.

The captain, trusting Ensign Blair’s instinct, instructed that the ship slow down. Only two hours later, the good engine stopped working altogether. With only half power remaining, the ship was able to limp into port.

Ensign Blair concluded, “With no way to steer the ship, we’d be sitting at the bottom of the sea right now.”

Three courageous acts hallmark the survival of both ship and crew. First, Ensign Blair’s willingness to risk his own life in the storm to assess the ship from areas of greatest concern, second, to recommend something to the captain that went against what the ship’s engineer recommended, and third, the captain’s willingness to make a judgment call based on the recommendation of an informal chaplain over the ship’s engineer.

I don’t know if the engineer was present when Ensign Blair made his recommendation to the captain. I don’t know if the engineer was angry that the captain took Ensign Blair’s recommendation over his. Was there an argument, and did the captain have to calm the engineer down?

In The Two Towers by J.R.R. Tolkien, Gandalf says to Saruman, “But you have been with the enemy for too long, Saruman. Your reason has been clouded, and your will has been twisted.” In the movie adaptation, Gandalf’s statement is phrased as, “when did reason give way to madness?”

In the United States, and in other parts of the world, our reason has been clouded by loud voices that tell us divisiveness is the only way. Of course, mainstream and social media both make the situation seem worse than it is. For example, a 2019 fight between two women in their mid-40s in a grocery store over how many items were allowed in the express lane got propelled to headline news.

The challenge really isn’t that the country is as divided as the media makes it seem. The challenge is that the vast majority who reside somewhere in the middle are too preoccupied by the everyday cares of life to do anything about it. The middle majority, paradoxically, is, for the most part, silent.

Edmund Burke is credited with making the statement, “The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good [people] to do nothing.”

Whether you subscribe to the idea of good and evil is immaterial in this context. There are things that are good for society and things that are not. When political leaders and other social influencers become as Saruman with their will twisted toward personal gain rather than the betterment of humanity, that’s where half the problem resides. The other half is in the mixture of burnout and apathy that keep the middle majority quiet.

On the national level, it’s been a long time since we’ve had major political candidates who articulate clearly what they stand for. Instead, they’re more interested in telling us why their opponent is such a bad person. That sounds like playing not to lose rather than playing to win.

Let people shine because of their own merits, not because they highlight the demerits of others. It’s like trying to make my dim flashlight shine brighter by asking others to turn theirs off, rather than putting new batteries in my own.

While Ensign Blair was an actual voice of reason in a very real storm, we each of us have the opportunity to be a voice of reason in the storms of life. Joseph Smith once said, “A very large ship is benefited very much by a very small helm in the time of a storm, by being kept workways with the wind and the waves.”

What will it be for you: part of the storm or part of the helm?

The Good Stuff Doesn't Need a Cheerleader

I rarely get enough sleep, so when an opportunity arises to sit still and listen to someone speak, I struggle to stay awake. I know I’ve missed a lot of good seminar content as my chin rests on my chest. Thankfully, I don’t drool. . .much.

It was a rare thing when I recently sat in a meeting, alert and attentive to what the speaker was saying. The speech was on a topic that I’d been contemplating for a while. Earlier that day, a thought occurred to me which was echoed almost verbatim by the speaker.

It was an aha! moment.

At times, those moments of discovery are followed by a quick login to several social media platforms to post about what I just learned. In the particular instance I just mentioned, I didn’t feel the urge to get on social media at all.

I just relished in the moment.

Profound moments occur in everyone’s life. These are the moments that shape who we are and serve as the basis for some of our deepest personal connections. These, our best and worst moments, have their own intrinsic value.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to share a profound moment with family, friends, or on social media. Where discretion and scrutiny are required, however, is when external validation starts to become more important than the intrinsic value of the experience itself.

In social gatherings, there’s a difference between the person who tends to be the life of the party and the person who is self-absorbed and can’t seem to stop talking about themselves and their accomplishments. The comedian Brian Regan has a bit where he talks about people trying to one-up each other at a party. Then, in walks Neil Armstrong who deadpans, “I’ve walked on the moon.”

Perhaps if you could claim having been in a two-person submersible that’s dived to the deepest depths ever reached, you might be on parallel with Mr. Armstrong’s accomplishment. Otherwise, if you’re playing the comparison game, you’ll lose every time.

The point here is that if your two-fold purpose in sharing something is to brag about your own accomplishments and devalue the accomplishments of others, just keep it to yourself.

There are some experiences — those profounds moments — that should be recognized for what they are, without feeling the need to (over)share them for external validation. Cherish what you learn in solitude then decide if sharing is more about fitting in than learning something for yourself.

We live in the time of oversharing for the sake of popularity, and much of what’s being shared is cut from whole cloth. Taking a step back to reflect on our own experiences and appreciate them can be inspiring, refreshing, and grounding. We don’t always need cheerleaders to hype the special moments of our lives.

Someday. One Day. Today.

 I’ve been married to my best friend for twenty-three years. Being with your favorite person is a privilege I hope I never take for granted. Twenty-three years is a long time — longer than the years we spent apart. We met when we were sixteen so we’ve known each other nearly two times longer than we didn’t. That’s also something special.

One of our favorite anniversary traditions is hike to any number of nearby waterfalls. We’re fortunate to live in a place where we can drive a relatively short distance and hike to perhaps even hundreds of waterfalls. Not too bad for a high desert.

My wife and me sitting in front of Gloria Falls, June 29, 2024

We used to take on some pretty strenuous hikes together. In recent years, we’ve slowed down a bit. Our knees ache a little more, and we’re content to do hikes that are not as difficult or ambitious as we used to conquer.

Being in nature is wonderful, and it’s a great place for us to be present with each other. Our hikes are opportunities for us to get lost in conversation together. The particular trail we hiked recently was easy enough that we were able to walk hand-in-hand for much of the short 2-mile loop.

Hiking is something we’ve done on our anniversary for more than a decade. We don’t have to decide to do it anymore, we only have to pick the waterfall we want to attempt that year. Since we live in a desert, dry years make it a little bit trickier to pick one that’s running, but we’ve yet to be disappointed with our efforts.

The conversation on our last hike was around how we want to live as we age. We’re both halfway to ninety years old. I don’t know if either, neither, or both of us will make it to that age, but we discussed the kind of physical and mental condition we want to be in as we age.

There’s truth in the statement that age isn’t a number. I’ve met some very young octogenarians and some very old sexagenarians. One of my running partners is sixty-five and he can still run circles around me.

We also participated in a class that seemed interesting to us. So, for three hours on our anniversary we “went to school.” As we age, some of our interests have converged and others have diverged but the way in which we support each other in our not-in-common interests has made all the difference. There’s a lot of joy to be found in watching another person spread their wings and fly into something new.

An anniversary comes with a built-in excuse that it’s (hopefully) going to be different than other days in some way. Often, you alter our typical behavior to do things you might reserve for that special day. You may purchase a special gift or go to a favorite place to eat that you may not visit regularly.

The important point isn’t the gifts or fancy meals. The point is that you assign special value to an anniversary — value that motivates you to do things differently.

What if you assigned that kind of value to other days of the year — every day of the year — as a way to motivate yourself to work toward those things that have lingered in the back of your mind?

I’m 45 years old now and I have a pretty good idea what I want to do when I grow up. It’s going to take some planning to get there, but there’s no reason not to make the incremental, daily efforts to get there.

Most of have obligations we have to meet everyday, but we also have more discretionary time than we’re willing to admit, particularly when streaming and social media have a near-constant presence in our lives.

What you do with your discretionary time can have a big impact on your progress toward goals. Imagine if you dedicated just a fraction of that time to things that move you closer to your dreams?

It’s easy to fall into a trap of thinking that you need big chunks of time to make progress. My 9th grade Spanish teacher was fond of reminding me that poco a poco, se va lejos. Little by little, you go far. It reads a little weird in English, but you get the idea.

Making use of fractional time requires finding a system that works for you. Perhaps it’s time blocking or the Pomodoro Technique where you use the “down time” to work toward a goal (related or otherwise). Making this time a non-negotiable in your daily routine will help establish consistent effort, build discipline, and provide a sense of accomplishment.

An important question to consider: why not treat everyday like a special day; embracing opportunities — big and small — to make progress toward something you really want. You might surprise yourself with how much you can accomplish over time.